My Favorite Things

Now that Christmas is coming up I am going to share some of my favorite things:
1. Saint Hedwig's Church is where we're getting married - this is nice because of Harry Potter - oh yes, and Z really likes it
2. My ring
3. Partial honeymoon in Charlotte, part in Charleston, Sarasota and DISNEY! Does it get better than Disney? No, I don't think so.
4. My ring
5. Harry Potter 7 part 1 is out in Theaters
6. My ring
7. Christmas songs on 4 radio stations - if you keep switching, you never have any commercials!
8. My ring
9. Flounder - aka my car, which right now smells like cigarettes, due to some idiot throwing out a flaming butt and it landing somewhere in my car and stinking up my interior for a month now
10. My ring

High Importance!!

You know when you get an email sent with high importance? It used to make me jump until I found that some people send EVERY email with that red exclamation point. This does not make sense to me. I don't think these people remember the little boy who cried wolf. I have two of these people in my life and am now able to recognize the emails for what they are and no longer feel the need to drop everything I'm working on when the email comes in to leap into action.

Really?

My first back to work after vacation I will remember forever and always. Word had gotten around about the engagement and everyone was coming up to me with their well wishes. There was one person who thought she would go one step beyond everyone else. She tried pulling my ring off my finger so she could try it on. Yep, for real. I really wonder what would make someone think that would be okay. I think I will never know.

Nail Magnet

In the past six weeks three of my tires have been attacked by nails. It's not my fault, of course. I'm not sure what they did wrong, but they have apparently made an enemy in their 13 months of life. It's a good thing Z can plug tires! I was a little apprehensive this time when the power drill came out and started making the hole bigger, but all worked out!
How did I know I had nails, you ask? Well, it's simple really; I have an air gauge in each tire that tells my car the pressure. As I am a very anal type A personality, I check them every day and notice when the air pressure goes down by 1 PSI. Then Z gets the call - "I think I have a nail in my tire". After the first one he thought I was kidding. After the second he thought I was crazy. After the third he accepted that he will be forever and always stuck with the task of fixing my messes.

Follow the Leader

My mother and I were going to both be less judgemental. Probably she's doing great. I decided I'm just too good at it to stop. Today would have been a test for even the most patient of people.
After work I stopped at the mall to get some clothes for vacation. I went into the fitting room and was the only one in there, out of twenty stalls. Perhaps thirty seconds later someone else came in and ended up in the stall right next to me. Another thirty seconds after that another woman came in and ended up on the other side of me. Yep, for real.
My next stop was at the drive up ATM. I pulled in and there was a beige car at the ATM with their door open and a woman hanging out squinting at the screen. Beige car, senior citizen, bad sign. First she did a balance inquiry. That took a bit. Squint at the receipt. Apparently okay to get cash, card went back in. $20 later, get back in the car. Note the checkbook. Put the cash in the wallet. S L O W L Y put the car in gear, pausing briefly in reverse, then oops, that's reverse! Shift all the way to drive. Pull away hesitantly. Look back in rearview mirror to see the four cars waiting not-so-patiently in her wake. Hahaha, yes, very funny.
My last stop was another drive thru to get a strawberry smoothie, yum! You guessed it, another senior citizen. I pulled up and she was ordering. It's possible she had never ordered food at a drive thru. After three minutes of her ordering her two items (I saw on the screen when I pulled up) she was finally okay to continue. It sounded like she had about fifteen questions for the poor restaurant worker. I pulled up behind her to wait in line. The two cars in front pulled up, she stayed in place. One of the two cars pulled away, again, she stayed in place. Ok, time to beep. BEEP! Not really, just a light tap. She pulled up to window number one and paid. Then she asked where her food was. Polite restaurant worker indicated she should pull up to window number two, as had the cars in front of her. Window two, here she comes! There was a transfer of ketchup, then the ketchup was handed back. Not sure what that was all about. Then it was my turn, too bad I couldn't show her how it's done.
Get me home, I can't take any more!

Connecticut

As many of you know I spend a lot of time in my car traveling from the Cape to Delaware. I have this problem of being too observant for my own good. One of the things I notice is license plates. Over the years Massachusetts has changed the format for our plates. They started out green, only the back plate was required. Around the time I got my license they changed to red plates, and two became the requirement, front and back. Three numbers and three letters turned into four numbers, two letters, turned into a mix. I think my favorite series are the M00 series. 123 M00 always brought a smile to my face. One good thing about Massachusetts is that we don't have temporary tags, when a car is registered you get real plates right away. Ah, the joy of having prisoners do something productive.
Some states have palm trees and crescent moons, some have sports teams, others have NASCAR drivers; I've seen NY go back to the original yellow/orange, there's the ever popular NJ yellow plates that you see as the drivers either go flying by you or cut you off; the Virginia drivers you can always witness on the side of the highway with the red and blue flashing lights behind them. Ontario will be the one in the slow lane reading the map as driving.
If you've ever traveled through Connecticut, though, I think they take the cake. What other state would let 123 WTF pass the test? I don't know wtf they were thinking, but it's always good for a laugh!

New Job?

Today was an exciting day at work. It was normal until lunch time, then we found the running toilet! A friend at work actually found it, but I was lucky enough to be involved! One of the toilets in our restroom was flushing non-stop, one was blocked and the third was just hanging out. We went in and kicked at it and tried the "jiggle the handle" trick. The next attempt was to try to flush the other toilets. One half worked, one continued to hang out. After a few minutes we figured out that our attempts were not really doing anything and we called the lucky maintenance man on his cell phone to step in and do his magic. I guess a job in plumbing is not in our near future.

Canada, Eh?

I'm wondering if a "Do Not Enter" road sign means something else in Canada. I was pulling in to a local restaurant for dinner and saw a car with Canada plates pulling in the exit that had a big red and white sign reading "Do Not Enter". And they were on the sidewalk. His solution? Back up into the four lane road. When that failed he pulled back in the exit and came in the wrong way. Today's lesson learned? Do not make an illegal left turn into an exit only, drive on the sidewalk, back up onto a highway, just to pull in the wrong way.

Pick on the Tourists

I'm curious what out of state people think when they travel over the Bourne Bridge and see....a rotary! What to do! It's interesting because no matter where they are in the rotary (or round-a-bout) they think they have the right of way. In Massachusetts, you must yield to people in the rotary. If you have out of state plates, those drivers think you yield to them no matter where they are, or whatever the situation might be. It is because of rotary driving I think my car should be equipped with a train horn. Or an 18-Wheeler horn, either one, I'm not picky. Z does not agree, he thinks I might scare someone into driving off the road. It's possible that I leave my hand on the horn for a while when I use it.

Fashion Sense

It is hard to believe that white socks pulled up to the knees with shorts was ever the fad, but think back to the '80s! Then it was white socks with a yellow or green stripe at the top, and tooooo short shorts. These days, middle aged men and older either do not listen to their wives or don't own a mirror when they go out of the house with their stark white socks pulled up as far as they go, and their sparkling white sneakers. And, of course, the rest of their clothing that has not a speck of white. Men - take this advice - DON'T DO IT!!

Mandatory Yearly Road Tests

The world is full of bad drivers, and the cape has claim to many of them. Let us start with the person who cuts me off every single day in the parking lot at work. Every day it's the same thing, back up in front of me (without looking) and don't wave "thank you". I can see once in a while, but every day? How does this person not have dents all over the car? Good thing everyone else is paying attention!

Speaking of accidents, I seem to have a bullseye on my rear bumper. I have had seven accidents, none of which have been my fault. I went a few years without having any and thought I was in the clear...no such luck! I got my new car in January, and in March I was rear-ended, and in another state. The DE state trooper who responded was amazed that I didn't carry an insurance card. I explained that MA does not use them. He didn't seem to believe me, but accepted it. I called Z after I called 911, since it was five minutes from his house. He came down and wanted to know if I was OK. Yes. He wanted to know if the woman who hit me was OK. My response was that I didn't care. Being the good guy that he is, Z went over and made sure she was not injured. $1500 later, new rear bumper! And a dirty Carfax for life...sigh.

I used to work at a bank - we had a customer (elderly) who did not look behind her when she backed up. Instead she repeatedly honked her horn as she was backing up, hoping that people would get out of her way. We were not really surprised when she stopped by one day with a crushed rear bumper.

Funny sighting of today: I was behind a yellow VW Beetle on the way home from work this afternoon. It was traveling at 45 MPH on the highway, with a man driving. How does one feel masculine while driving a yellow bug?

Lightning Never Strikes Twice

Statistics tell us that men are struck by lightning more often than women. Why is that, you ask? Is it because they're taller? Nope. Is it because they work outdoors more often? Negative. It's because they do silly things like change floodlight bulbs in the rain on a metal ladder in the middle of a lightning storm, as witnessed on my way home from work this afternoon. I was passing an oil change business and had to look twice. What made it worse was there were two men, one holding the ladder and one on it. Apparently they absolutely had to change that bulb right then and there, even though it's light out until 9:00 in the summer, and they're not open at night. Who am I to judge?

Noteworthy event from this week: the green jeep from Utah that ran the red light and cut me off, then asked me directions. C'mon, people. Do you forget how to drive when you cross over the bridge? Experience tells me the answer to that question is a big, resounding YES.

There's a Fair in the Air!

Yay! The Barnstable County Fair starts Friday! Fried Dough! Yummy Chicken! Ice Cream! Can't you just hear the guys yelling to come play their water game, best prizes in town! Now I just need to find a sucker...er friend to come with me. Usually there is at least one 80s rock band performing. And there's always fried dough, which to me is worth the admission price any day. So much for the diet.....

Picture the Scene.....

I picked up a salad for dinner at a local pizza place - when I walked into the restaurant, there were two tables with people; one had employees and the second had a family of four. There are probably twelve tables plus a row of pub chairs with an island on one side of the building, facing the wall. I order the salad and take a seat in one of the pub chairs to wait. While I was patiently (hahaha) waiting, an older gentleman came in, ordered, and kind of wandered around in my area. I did not pay attention to what he was doing, I was checking out the menu. My salad came out fairly quickly. I stood up and started to leave. The wandering man decided that he HAD to have my seat and told me that he was "just going to sit here". Okay. Whatever. Did I leave a $20 bill on the counter? Was it my perfume? Nope, people are just crazy, and it's summer on the cape.

Summer on the Cape Part 1

Ah yes, once July 4th comes around it really is summer on the Cape. 6-20 mile back ups to get over the bridges, more out of state plates than local, people stopping in the middle of the road to look at something, people who don't KNOW HOW TO YIELD driving into the rotary, $25/day to park at the area beaches, 45 to an hour waits at restaurants on Friday and Saturday nights, at least an hour to drive the 26 mile commute home, not being able to get off the cape on weekends, the list goes on and on.

Why did we move here, you ask? It was the lure of no snow in the winter (which is not quite true) and cooler weather in the summer (witness the 4 days of 98 degree weather we just had). The hydrangeas are nice. Hmmm... what else is good again?

We have 3 more months of this fun to go. I'm already looking forward to Columbus Day.

Today's Sighting: the tourist going the wrong way on a turnaround - at least they ended up going the right way in the end.